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This was supposed to posted at Jan 08, 2009 as it was the birthday’s date.  But, oh well.

Happy Birthday! A lot of thing I wanna say:

I’m so sorry had treated you like a porcelain
You’re so beautiful and precious and plain
That I thought I may not have had vain
Since you’re gift from the saint.

So…, it is funny when you said I had treated you like shit
That you didn’t felt my respect even a bit
Onto my heart you really blow huge hit
Sending me out of the orbit
Made me felt guilty like a kid,
or worse, a twit.
Oh yes dear, you really did.

You rejected my suggestion
to hear each other explanation
You said: time will heal our condition
But hell, time do nothing since we have no action
Still you refused any co-operation to improve our relation
And that was the start of our current situation.

I miss you and have had adored you
Always do
And only you.

Really, I don’t wanna say goodbye
Though I know you’re the one who didn’t want to try
I was missing you and still will I
But I can no longer bear myself to cry
I need to be free and fly
You can reach me though, ‘cos I won’t be high
I love you and I’m not shy
I forgive you and there’s no why.

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©Desovia @06/01/09
revise: 23/03/09

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I’m not a saint.
But seems like I’m trying to be one,
by judging [almost] everything, everyone.

I’m not a saint.
Nor I want to be one.
I’ve been thru’ experiment and pain
that I know I’m going to be someone.
Anyone, except for a saint.

I’m not a saint.
Not sure neither I’m a villain.
though I’m having affair with the evil
that most of time I created suffer.
Nevertheless, I will stop judging people,
and it should makes me feel better.

I’m not a saint.
Though I’m acting like one.
I have have been lain
and notice it’s never done.

I’m not a saint,
but it’s human nature to flirting with taint.
While it’s vain and giving no gain,
I think it’s okay to playing saint.
Sometimes. When the sky’s no rain.

I’m not a saint. Or trying to be one.
Not sure I’m a villain and trying to be one.
But thanks God I’m not a saint.
I’m just human, that is the main.

The end.

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©Desovia @27.11.08

When I thought I got cancer symptoms, these words crossed my mind:

The only thing I’ll be worried towards die,
is how I’m gonna say goodbye.
The only thing makes me sorry if I’m gone:
I’m going to leave some people alone.
The only thing that cheer me up about this fact, 
that I’m gonna rest in peace at last.

Please notice I’m lying when I say:
I wanna see you guys smile when I lay.
Due to the truth I wanna hear a very big cry
From whose have tears and blood runs dry
Just my last wish in letting go off my stay,
from this not so left world right to pray.

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©Desovia @14.09.08 | revise @22.11.08